1. 9:00 AM - 10:00 AM family gathering/viewing
Greeting 10:00 AM - 10:30 AM (guest book signing - seating)
2. The Welcome
Good morning. On behalf of the Chau family, thank you for coming.
We are here to honor the life of Nong Chau.
I’d like to remind everyone to please silence your cell phones at this time.
My name is Leif Schmit-Kallas, and I am Nong's son-in-law. I've stepped in to officiate the ceremony today and I hope Nong would approve.
By the time I married Phuong Chau in 2015, I already had a few years of Nong’s relationship wisdom under my belt. Nong was loud, yet silence was our primary form of communication. He never started an argument. And while the silence between us could sometimes feel a bit uncomfortable, the language barrier never actually inhibited our relationship.
He would often drop by our house unannounced to check in and see the baby. Sometimes we barely had 15 minutes to get the house ready. One time he generously brought a box of steamed lobsters from his work because the price was right.
His incredible work ethic and sense of humor were the defining traits of his character.
Nong also cared deeply about my career. Not too long ago I lost my job. It was for the second time in a year… when breaking the news to Nong he exclaimed “AGAIN!” in utter shock and disapproval. I was unemployed for several months and finally landed a job offer, he was the first person I wanted to tell. I drove straight to 99 Ranch and headed to the butcher counter. Luckily, he was on shift. I waved him down, and when he came over, I told him the good news. I hoped it made his day; I knew how much it mattered to him that I was doing my part to provide for the family.
Then in late 2025 he was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer and passed away, at our home in Riverside, on New Years Day 2026.
I will truly miss Nong for the silence that spoke a thousand words. Nong led by example; he was the mast of the ship.
Prelude
If you knew Nong, you knew he wasn't a man of many words. He wasn't interested in being the center of attention, and he certainly wasn't interested in flowery speeches. He was practical. He was a man of duty.
We know that life wasn't always easy, and Nong wasn't always easy going, but he was solid. Nong was a warrior, who became a dutiful father. With that there are times when he set aside his own comfort, and even his home of origin, to ensure his family had what they needed to thrive. He made sure the bills were paid even at the price of his own retirement.
Nong, above all else, was a provider for his family who expressed love through labor. In a world where love is often spoken, Nong’s love was built through long hours and hard work, through calloused hands, and through an unshakeable commitment to putting his family first.
His joy was seeing his family grow.
His calling remained to be his sacrifice and hard work on behalf of his family. That sacrifice was his offering.
Today, we pause to acknowledge that sacrifice. We are here today to say 'Thank you' to the man who carried the weight so his family didn't have to.
3. The Eulogy / Life Tribute
Thank you all again for being here. Your presence is a comfort to the family and a testament to the impact Nong had on all of us.
We are here not just to mourn a loss, but to celebrate a life. And a life is best measured not in years, but in the memories left behind and the stories we share. To help us paint a picture of the person we loved and to share some of those precious memories, we will now hear from those who knew Nong best.
To begin, I would like to invite Phuong Schmit-Kallas, Nong's youngest daughter, to come forward.
Phuong
Now Nong's wife, Lien Chau will come forward to speak. Her speech is in Vietnamese, and afterwards Phuong will translate in English.
Lien
4. Guest Speaker
Now we would like to extend an invitation to anyone who knows Nong and would like to share their experiences with us.
…
Thank you
5. The Ritual of Offering (The preparation for the Burning of Spirit Money)
Nong spent his earthly life ensuring that everyone else was provided for. He worked hard to make sure there was money in the bank and food on the table. Now, it is our turn to provide for him.
For those unfamiliar with this tradition, the burning of 'Joss paper'—or Spirit Money—is a practice that goes back thousands of years.
In the Buddhist tradition, it is believed that the spirit undertakes a journey for 49 days after passing. It is believed the spirit undergoes judgment and travels through different stages for 7 weeks (49 days) before reincarnation or entering the pure land.
The offerings will help Nong's spirit during this specific "travel" time,
Nong is currently on a journey. And just as you would never send a loved one on a long trip without money in their pocket, we do not send Nong into the next life empty-handed.
We have here traditional spirit money—gold, silver, and copper. In a moment, I am going to invite the family, and then friends, to come forward. You will see sheets of paper that resemble gold, silver, and copper.
The Gold represents the highest honor, traditionally reserved for deities, but offered today to elevate Nong’s spirit.
The Silver is the currency of the ancestors, connecting him to those who have gone before him.
The Copper and bank notes are practical—they are 'travel funds.'
Nong understood the value of a dollar. He understood that money meant safety, food, and shelter for his family.
By burning this paper, we transform it from the physical world to the spiritual world. We are ensuring that in this next phase of existence, he has the means to pay his debts, smooth his path, and live without want.
The Flowers (White and Yellow)
We also will place flowers in the coffin. The flowers acknowledge our sadness.
You may also notice the specific colors of the flowers here today.
White is the color of grief and purity. It represents the family's deep sorrow and the sincerity of their hearts.
Yellow represents freedom from worldly cares. It is the color of sunlight and wisdom, guiding the way forward toward enlightenment.
When we cremate Nong the offerings will turn to ash. The fire represents our action. We burn this not just as a ritual, but as a message. As the smoke rises, we are sending resources to Nong for his journey. We are returning the favor. We are telling him: 'You took care of us. Now, take this, and go in peace. You don't have to worry about the bills anymore. You don't have to work anymore. Be wealthy in spirit.'
I invite the family to come forward to deposit the first offering.
Family comes forward
At this time the family would like to extend an invitation to come forward, take a sheet, and flowers, and place it in the coffin.
Script: Closing Words
At 12:45 PM we will gather again. At that time guests are asked to follow Nong's family in procession to the crematory.
Cremation is the final acknowledgment that he no longer needs this physical form to carry the weight of the world. Through the act of cremation, we have returned his elements to nature.
Fire is the bridge. It transforms the object into smoke, which rises to the spirit world where the ancestor can receive it. As the fire burns down and the smoke clears, we hold a specific hope for Nong Chau. We hope that during these 49 days of mourning and transition, he finds the spiritual peace that he perhaps didn't have time for in this life. We hope he finds his path clearly. In Buddhism death is not an end, but a transition.
Nong Chau has finished his shift. His work is done. The family is safe.
6. Procession at 12:45 pm - 1 pm cremation
Lead by Pal bearers - followed by the immediate family - and lastly guests
7. Closing & Announcements
Thank you all for coming to honor the presence of this man Nong Chau. Please join the family for the Reception. All are welcome.
God bless Nong, I wish you a peaceful journey.
